Saturday I notice a tingling feeling in both hands. I have had this feeling for a long time, but at that point it seemed present all the time while other times came and went.... I aasked a friend of mine who is a nurse and he told me that maybe it's because of lifting wrong.... I don't think I lift wrong...but anyway it could be a pinched nerve or something...I have no idea, I have to see a doctor...I have an appointment tomorrow....The thing is that that friend told me I might not be able to lift heavy again....that piece of "news" crushed me.... I couldn't stop crying just thinking of the possibility of not being able to lift. I just hope he's wrong...At that point I though that, being like that, fitocracy doesn't make any sense for me so...I deleted my account. I don't want to be there if I only can log shit workouts.... it would make me feel ashamed... It hit me quite hard... I still don't know what's wrong, neither if it is actually a problem...but I can't make my peace with the idea.... Now that I'm starting to see results, it would be awful if I had to stop. Now that I found something I like....Ok, I like bodycombat too...but I want to lift, I want the challenge, I want to get stronger and push myself and want to transform my body.
last thursday it was amazing: I got to see my serratus for the first time, I was amazed...Like...seeing progress little by little...and I don't want to stop.
My weekend was plain awful...and I took two rest days (Saturday and Sunday) instead of one :( I was just exhausted, tired, depressed, unmotivated..... Actually I was unmotivated today too but I went to the gym, it was chest day..... and I'm thinking about coming back to fitocracy but I guess I should wait until I know for sure if I can keep on lifting. I really hope so.
I'm still feeling quite down. The gym couldn't cheer me up so much....not today.... :(
Other things I should mention at the appointment tomorrow, apart from the tingling feelinf is the pain in the elbows and the weak knee.... Fuck! I'm a mess!!!!
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