dumped

Now I'm training on my own. It was the awfulest day ever at the gym and my PT couldn't put up with it so....he dumped me...it feels like crap, it feels like when a BF dumps you, just instead of the "we can remain friends" is "you can join me training"...it was too much for him having to plan the sessions and having to take into account if I eat enough, recover enough, etc...then he told me he invests too much time on me for very little money (which is true) cause it's also explaining stuff after the sessions, sending me links on FB (which, btw, I didn't ask for most of the times!)...and he has always said he likes training me.... And now...I fucked up one day, I did, I admit it, I did two sessions of bodycombat yesterday and I haven't recovered enough... that's my fault and I know it,... I didn't know it yesterday, that it would hinder me that much, otherwise I wouldn#t have done two sessions!... And today he was angry cause he had prepared a big volume session and saw i wouldn't be able... I wasn't.... Whe he taught me the "bear" I was so overwhelmed that I wanted to quit training altogether, back to fitness classes and starving myself and get skinny fat, ... it was just a momentary thought....but I fucked up... I don't want that.... but I hate when I feel not able and that's the feeling I had...and instead of sympathy , what do I get? dumped....i get dumped!...maybe i'm better off this way. i'll keep on doing my thing and show him in the future that I can and that I don't need to get fat for that!!! I'll get stong, and muscles, and won't get fat. I trusted him and since I was in his hands i followed his advice to the T, but now that I'm on my own, I'll do what I consider best: changes in my diet and lifting just as heavy and increasing.... If I see I can't then maybe I'll experiment with the diet a bit. As for cardio...he said just ONCE a week... I find it really low but...i'll try and let's see what happens...after all we'll still be in contact and I'll keep him posted about my workouts, it's not like bye-bye forever..."we can still be friends".



I'm not giving up. I've achieved a lot in one month, it would be a waste.